Alonzo Bodden: Historically Incorrect

2018, what the hell is going on? Hawaii just got an incoming nuclear missile threat and because of our new leader, people believed it. We have lost our way as a country. The world thinks we’re a joke and there’s a joke in the most powerful position in the world. I would give my yakuza pinkie right now for Mitt Romney. All that being said the new show is a killer balance between right and left. Thoughtful conservatives and my Grandma are starting to realize that we made a mistake. AMERIGEDDON is bringing the country together one drunk audience at a time. It’s for all of us because it takes one side, The side of America. Don’t worry about anything people! It’ll be okay, we will survive, or live in a post apocalyptic gasoline fueled thrill ride where tribes fight each other over who should lead...just like now, except we’ll all have Mohawks.

When Isabelle and Theo invite Matthew to stay with them, what begins as a casual friendship ripens into a sensual voyage of discovery and desire in which nothing is off limits and everything is possible.

A New York drug dealer is kidnapped, and his wife must try to come up with the money and drugs to free him from his abductors before Christmas.

Columbus has made a habit of running from what scares him. Tallahassee doesn't have fears. If he did, he'd kick their ever-living ass. In a world overrun by zombies, these two are perfectly evolved survivors. But now, they're about to stare down the most terrifying prospect of all: each other.

Harry Potter has lived under the stairs at his aunt and uncle's house his whole life. But on his 11th birthday, he learns he's a powerful wizard—with a place waiting for him at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. As he learns to harness his newfound powers with the help of the school's kindly headmaster, Harry uncovers the truth about his parents' deaths—and about the villain who's to blame.

Puss in Boots discovers that his passion for adventure has taken its toll: He has burned through eight of his nine lives, leaving him with only one life left. Puss sets out on an epic journey to find the mythical Last Wish and restore his nine lives.

One little ancient British village still holds out against the Roman invaders. Asterix and Obelix are invited to help. They must face fog, rain, warm beer and boiled boar with mint sauce, but they soon have Governor Encyclopaedius Britannicus's Romans declining and falling. Until a wild race for a barrel of magic potion lands them in the drink.

A ticking-time-bomb insomniac and a slippery soap salesman channel primal male aggression into a shocking new form of therapy. Their concept catches on, with underground "fight clubs" forming in every town, until an eccentric gets in the way and ignites an out-of-control spiral toward oblivion.

When the Emperor of China issues a decree that one man per family must serve in the Imperial Chinese Army to defend the country from Huns, Hua Mulan, the eldest daughter of an honored warrior, steps in to take the place of her ailing father. She is spirited, determined and quick on her feet. Disguised as a man by the name of Hua Jun, she is tested every step of the way and must harness her innermost strength and embrace her true potential.

Two astronomers go on a media tour to warn humankind of a planet-killing comet hurtling toward Earth. The response from a distracted world: Meh.

A wheelchair-bound photographer spies on his neighbors from his apartment window and becomes convinced one of them has committed murder.

When decorated soldier Captain Colter Stevens wakes up in the body of an unknown man, he discovers he's part of a mission to find the bomber of a Chicago commuter train.