Stanley Baxter

as Self

as Benny 'The Kid' Lindowski

as 'Jock' Everett / Kommondant Stamfel

as Self (archive footage)

as Gofer / Slap (voice)

as Dexter Munro

as R. S. Widdowes

as Postman

as Murdoch Troon

as Self

as Self

as Self

as William Hazlitt

as Tourism Agent, Loch Ness Monster

as Stanley Baxter

as Mr. Majeika

as Himself